Searching these forums then, is something you need to start to do, since it’s been mentioned here many times how to achieve that, along with it being in the main FVWM FAQ on fvwm.org.
Yes, switch to using 2.5.18 – using FvwmTheme is a little cumbersome, and you don’t necessarily have to start from scratch, just take parts of other people’s config and use it in your own. If you need help converting your current 2.4.X config to 2.5.X, post it to these forums (that is to say, a link to it).
I’ve been using Fvwm for about the same time as you are, and I like coming here and look at what other people have done with their config. Basically my config is patched with other people’s config, then modifying it to suit my taste.
So take a look around the forum, if you see anything you like, ask for their config. Then cut and paste that into your own config, then modify it. If you’re stuck modifying, look for fvwm manpage on the main webpage (http://www.fvwm.org).
As for your config, maybe it’s nice to have pixmaps button rather than fvwm vector buttons, and I personally like the thumbnail iconmanager.